What are we-men hungry for ?

Being in the health and wellness industry for a few decades and being more mature than some of my colleagues, I seem to have assumed the title of counsellor . Not only on health issues but relationship ones ! Who would have thought , I mean to say I have it so going on when it comes to this department . So when it comes to relationships between men and women the question is what do we want ?

What are we hungry for ? If you speak to a man that has just walked away with half of his millions and gave away the engagement ring that cost him thousands he would say that ' she wanted it all ' if you speak to an older woman that has been usurped by a newer and younger model she may say that " It was always about him ',.Thirty  years of my life and there goes the neighborhood ! On the other hand You could be single because you understand that there is a combination of both thoughts.

Men and women , and never the twain shall meet ! Men see black and women see  white . A lot of women  see men as  selfish with nothing but their little worm to guide them throughout their life . Some men see women as emotional beings with  their own needs being neglected. It is a bit of a conundrum really, as we are social, supposedly intelligent beings   designed to live with a mate to mate with and live . So where have we gone wrong? Men are still crabby cross and blame their lack of financial success to their 3rd wife! Or women are still sitting on the poverty line since their divorce and  their foolish belief, that "he'd look after me". Yeah, well how'd that work out for you ?

Sitting on the fence, I see both situations . As part of my job, we look at lifestyles of my clients . This includes being a detective, so to speak. Our emotional health can play a huge role in physical health so I search to ascertain any additional emotional stresses that may be contributing to their  health issues. ISSSSUUUUEEESSSS ! We all have them and they seem to get bigger as we get older. Baggage, or what ever these issues can challenge us , stay with us and not allow us to keep that relationship that we have just  let go ! Who knows? as separation and divorce is sadly becoming the norm.
Whether or not who is to blame is irrelevant, the fact of the matter is that at some point, one or another in a relationship wants out, and for what ever reason. Years ago , we used to put up and shut up , but now it seems to be the case that most breakups with out having a third party involved, comes from a woman's initiative.  Emily Pankhurst , Germaine Greer, the burning of the bra, the urge to climb the corporate ladder and the strive to gain  independence or equality educated us well enough that it is well within our rights, but  at what cost?

In any case, the real question is do we think that someone else will complete us or do we enter a relationship that will compliment us. If you think the former, well you are in trouble. Serial relationship contenders seem to think that having someone else in their life may benefit them with no real consideration of the fact that to be happy in a relationship you first need to be happy with yourself. This is where the trouble begins. The person that isn't happy almost relies on that other person for their happiness and then when that expectation is not being met they go on in search again and so the cycle continues. We just have to ask our self what do you really want? What is it that makes you happy or stay happy ? Is a relationship with the opposite sex such a difficult task?

The wheel continues to turn so I guess if you take on a woman or a man , ask yourself can you live with out them, can you put up with their unforgivable idiosyncrasies and let them live an independent life with no jealousy, malice and assumptions. Can you  live in the now and forget about the future or the past ? Look first within and you may see with out!




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